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Expectations. Resentment. Humour. Debts. Guilt. Love. Have you eaten yet? Things are not what they seem. Cracks are everywhere. Remember Lolo explores how Alzheimer’s disease affects a Filipino family and asks ‘what do we owe to our families’. 
those who know me know i'm a big sap... so it'll probably be no surprise to learn that i cried during the show, and on my grandparents' shoulders outside the theatre... what's really surprising is how Byron managed to pack so much in that hour without, as one
review put it, the play sinking under its own weight... to say that the play is that heavy would be an understatement... i'm not even sure where to begin...
what made it really emotional was having my own lolo and lola in the audience... i could just imagine how our family would deal with this type of situation, and it pained me in a lot of ways to see myself and my family reflected in some of the characters... of course, any filipino would easily be able to see his own family situation reflected in these cultural archetypes: the doting-and-sometimes-obsessive-compulsive mother, the oft-absent father, the all-too-perfect son groomed to be a role model to his squabbling less-than-perfect siblings, the martyr-like grandmother who lives to take care of everyone, and the sometimes-difficult-to-handle-but-still-loveable grandfather... yes, it was this very insanity that i just recently moved away from, and which hit me full force last night in the Factory Studio Theatre...
i was basically raised by my grandparents up to the time i was ready to start school, and even beyond then they have always been there for me, taking care of my (and our family's) every need... as the years have gone by, i've become less and less dependent on them, and perhaps as a corollary, i've come to engage with them less and less... moving out filled me with a lot of guilt because i realized that i would have even less time to spend with my family, and it seemed so selfish of me to want to break away from the very people who have taken care of me and loved me unconditionally my whole life... it cut very deeply to see that same guilt and anxiety portrayed on stage last night...
when i was younger, i used to volunteer at
Baycrest Centre and
Carefree Lodge, care facilities for the elderly in toronto... i visited residents and seniors in the community and assisted during mealtimes and outings, amongst other things... kind of ironic that i went out my way to engage with these people, many of whom had little contact with their own families, when my grandparents had just come to canada to live with us... still, it was another perspective from my past which informed my viewing of the play, particulary during the scene with the family wrestling with the idea of putting a loved one in a care facility... i joke with my mom and my grandmother about sticking them in a home, but g-d knows i'd give up my life before considering that option (i too have seen TV specials on the state of care facilities for the elderly in this country -- which is
not to say anything about the aforementioned institutions)... but in the filipino mindset, this would be unspeakable... the notion of debt and gratitude and the importance of family is so ingrained in our culture that to even raise the idea would be sacrilegious... but the slow adaptation of Western norms into immigrant culture has threatened the sanctity of family and the ideals of respectfulness, charity, and self-sacrifice which we were taught to hold dear when we were growing up -- a conflict captured to great effect by Byron...
all in all, it was a sunday evening well spent... while some of the acting performances may have called for a bit more refinement, there was also something genuine about the sometimes awkward and stilted delivery of the lines, almost like how most filipinos speak english (on a side note, Caroline Mangosing's portrayal of the stereotypical filipino mother -- right down to her accent -- was dead-on)... it was the only thing i got to see from this year's
Summerworks Festival, but i'm glad for it to have been the only one... i would definitely like to see this play developed into a full-length production and on a bigger stage for a wider audience...
and on a personal note, i'm proud to call Byron a friend, albeit a distant one through family... his mom and my mom have known each other for about 30 years, and his family were among the first to welcome us when we moved to canada... i have memories of his grandmother sitting us around the TV to watch a tape of Byron's "how do you get the caramel in the cadbury?" commercial (the one with the monks), and i knew from then that the guy was gonna be big (OK, i was 10 at the time, but let's just pretend i was rooting for him all along)... no, seriously, i've been truly impressed with his accomplishments and always look forward to seeing his work... i also happened to cry last time i saw him on stage in Ryerson University's production of
The Laramie Project (he also recently starred in
The Romance of Magno Rubio, with mixed reviews)... my endorsement of his work is not only because i know him and genuinely like him as a person, but because he is truly talented and has -- as those artsies would say -- a "special voice" which needs to be heard... it's very rare that i delve into my roots and embrace my culture (a subject for another day), but Byron's play has definitely given me some excellent food-for-thought...
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