aaaaaaahhhhhhh...
--------------------
*not to be confused with aaahhhhh*
notice this time that there's a bit more of an accent on the first part...
oh, i don't know what the hell i'm saying anymore... i'm just rambling and writing for the sake of relieving stress... i haven't been able to go to the gym since before NYC so this is my only other outlet to get my mind off everything that is (or isn't) happening right now...
i've just spent about 8 hours at the library (give or take, with the nap and everything else)... i can't really say if i'm being productive or what, i'm just basically skimming through the hundreds of pages of reading that i'm behind, so i don't know how much (if any) of it will stick come exam time... and i guess, by then, it'll be too late to do anything about it...
why do i keep saying yes when asked to do something? or rather, why is it that i have a hard time saying 'no' to certain things but absolutely have no qualms about disappointing certain people? i can't even introspect my motivations anymore cuz even i don't know what they are at this point... i need to sit down and figure out priorities and not just be so "go go go" with no real sense of direction...
ok, so this really doesn't make sense, but no one's paying attention anyway, so it doesn't matter much... all i can say is that i've got a truckload of stuff that i'm signed on to do, and i can't make heads or tails about my priorities... i miss my friends and i feel that i've drifted from them, even though i have quasi-contact with them everyday and it hasn't been all that long since i've seen them... i'm feeling bogged down and alone at school, even though i'm more involved now and talk to more people than before, but i still don't get that "vibe" that i'm a part of something... i don't know... maybe i should stop trying to "fit in" and acknowledge that certain cliques have cemented and that i've got my own life to live anyway... or just ask me about it in a day or two and i'll probably have a compeletely different weltenschaung...
yeah, i just had to throw that word in...
--------------------
Current mood: lacunal
Current music: Staind -- So Far Away
*not to be confused with aaahhhhh*
notice this time that there's a bit more of an accent on the first part...
oh, i don't know what the hell i'm saying anymore... i'm just rambling and writing for the sake of relieving stress... i haven't been able to go to the gym since before NYC so this is my only other outlet to get my mind off everything that is (or isn't) happening right now...
i've just spent about 8 hours at the library (give or take, with the nap and everything else)... i can't really say if i'm being productive or what, i'm just basically skimming through the hundreds of pages of reading that i'm behind, so i don't know how much (if any) of it will stick come exam time... and i guess, by then, it'll be too late to do anything about it...
why do i keep saying yes when asked to do something? or rather, why is it that i have a hard time saying 'no' to certain things but absolutely have no qualms about disappointing certain people? i can't even introspect my motivations anymore cuz even i don't know what they are at this point... i need to sit down and figure out priorities and not just be so "go go go" with no real sense of direction...
ok, so this really doesn't make sense, but no one's paying attention anyway, so it doesn't matter much... all i can say is that i've got a truckload of stuff that i'm signed on to do, and i can't make heads or tails about my priorities... i miss my friends and i feel that i've drifted from them, even though i have quasi-contact with them everyday and it hasn't been all that long since i've seen them... i'm feeling bogged down and alone at school, even though i'm more involved now and talk to more people than before, but i still don't get that "vibe" that i'm a part of something... i don't know... maybe i should stop trying to "fit in" and acknowledge that certain cliques have cemented and that i've got my own life to live anyway... or just ask me about it in a day or two and i'll probably have a compeletely different weltenschaung...
yeah, i just had to throw that word in...
--------------------
Current mood: lacunal
Current music: Staind -- So Far Away
posted by þΛųL jØŋαŦhΛŋ @ 22:45
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